Still Just Way Too Much
by Davens
Summary: Jude loves Tommy, but doesn't realize it yet. Tommy loves Jude, but won't admit it. What will it take to get them to confess their feelings? Who knows... Read and find out... R&R TJ
1. The Beginning

Still Just Way Too Much

Chapter 1: The Beginning

By: Can't Stand The Heat

There was a shadowed figure walking the halls of G-Major at 2:00 in the morning. There was a flash of lightning and it lit up the face of a young woman. Through the window she saw the rain falling hard. The thunder rumbled in the distance. There was another flash of lightning and it yet again lit up the face of a young woman with red hair falling in her face, green eyes that were red and irritated from the crying she had been doing, her pretty face was ruined with tear-tracks going down her cheeks. She had been crying for the man she loved, the man who broke her heart too many times to count, the man who said he loved her but never could. She walked into Recording Room B (A/N ?) and saw her guitar. She picked it up and began to play.

_Looking out the window,_

_All I see is rain,_

_As each drop falls,_

_I feel my own pain._

_The lightning strikes,_

_The thunder rumbles,_

_I sit alone,_

_As my heart crumbles._

_The winds pick up,_

_The rain falls,_

_You're the one,_

_That broke my walls._

_The rain falls harder,_

_As you start our sin,_

_The lightning CRACKS!_

_This storms gonna win._

_Through the window I see,_

_Someone trying to be me,_

_You're standing there,_

_Just to stare._

_Storm,_

_The rain falls,_

_Storm,_

_The thunder calls._

_The thunder rumbles,_

_My heart is torn,_

_The lightning strikes,_

_My internal storm._

_The darkness yearns,_

_For a soul to kill,_

_The lightning wishes,_

_For someone to grill._

_Drip, Drop,_

_The rain drops,_

_Drip, Drop,_

_It just won't stop._

_CRACK!_

_The lightning lights the sky,_

_CRACK!_

_In the blink of an eye._

_The rain cleans,_

_The window pane,_

_The dirty filth,_

_Is washed away._

_I look into the distance,_

_Thinking of what I could be,_

_But all I see,_

_Is you staring back at me._

_I try to smile,_

_But I frown,_

_My love for you,_

_Keeps weighing me down._

_I look to the future,_

_But it doesn't last,_

_I look back,_

_But all I see is an empty past._

_I try to block the memories,_

_But they keep coming back,_

_They taint my soul,_

_Which is turning black._

_So I sit alone,_

_And watch my past,_

_I realize now,_

_That we should be together at last._

_Once again,_

_Back in reality,_

_This storm rages on,_

_Like my own personal tragedy,_

_The drip, drop of the rain,_

_Is like my pain._

_The crashing thunder,_

_Is like my sightless blunder._

_The bounding of a book,_

_That is now outworn,_

_The dawning of a storm,_

_Which should've never been born._

_This storm reeks,_

_Of tragedy,_

_While I'm shocked,_

_Back into reality._

_Cold as ice,_

_The hail falls,_

_The world slows,_

_The storm stalls,_

_You side-step each raindrop,_

_You bypass each thunder,_

_You race each lightning,_

_You're drowning under._

_The final drop falls,_

_The final thunder stalls,_

_The final lightning's born,_

_This is the beginning of my heart-filled storm._

She comes out of the song, to hear clapping. She turns around to see him. He had been standing there through-out the whole song? Why didn't he say anything?

"Hey, Tommy. What are you doing here? It's like 2:00 in the morning."

"I should be asking you that, Jude. What are you doing here?"

"I'm just working on my new song."

"Why not wait until tomorrow? Why now?"

"There was an actual storm going on. It gave me a sudden burst of inspiration."

"Well, that's ok, but…" Tommy sighed. "So, are you ok? I mean, is everything ok between us?" Tommy asked thinking of three days ago.

!Flashback!

Tommy was in the studio, when Jude stormed in.

"Jude, what's wrong?"

"It's nothing Tommy. I mean, come on, in the past couple of days things have been really harsh. Shay was cheating on me, Shay broke up with me (on my birthday on national T.V.), you kissed me-"

"Shh… not so loud."

"Oh, yes. I remember now, you want me to forget about it. How can I forget a kiss from the man I love? Answer me that, Quincy." Jude said, her voice rising with each word she said.

"Jude, you don't love me. It's just some school-"

"Tommy, it's not a school-girl crush. If it was I could handle being around, but it's not, and I can't." Jude said and fled the studio.

!End Flashback!

This was the first time we had talked since then. And now he had to come and ruin my song…

"Jude, please listen to me…"

"Listen to what, Tommy? Listen to you break my heart again and again? Listen to you decide my life for me? Listen to you try to protect me, but you're really just afraid? Listen to you make my choices for me? Listen to you tell me that I could never love you but I do…"

"Jude if you would've told me this we could've been…"

"Told you what? That I loved you? Just to hear you say that I couldn't? If I would've told you that I loved you, chaos would have occurred. Never would the peace return, for if you left, it would break my heart, and the pieces would never come back. If I had told you how much I love you, it would be dangerous, for I wouldn't know what you would've done. Do know how hard it was to work with you everyday? How hard it was to be around you and knowing that nothing could ever happen? Do you know how hard it was to control myself when that love began to grow? Do you know Quincy? Do you really know?" I was breathing heavily by now, my emotions running haywire, as I finally told exactly how I felt about him. Then…

I was pulled forward and there were lips on mine… I opened my eyes to see Tommy's piercing blue one staring back at me… I pulled away from heaven straight into hell.

"Tommy! Why? Do you like hurting me? Like seeing me break to pieces? Like seeing me fall apart? Remember the last time you kissed? I'm still trying to pick up the pieces…" I was crying now…I had lost my angel, and received a demon…Why?...

I walked towards the door, but he grabbed me.

"Jude, listen this time. If you had told me just how much you loved me, then I could have told you how much I loved you. My heart aches for you, my soul burns for you, and now we can be together girl. Now we can be everything you and I want us to be." And then he let me go, thinking I would go back to him… But I couldn't… He's lying… I shook my head… And then I ran…

"Jude…" He could still feel her lips on his…

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When I got home, no one was there. No one ever was anymore. So I went upstairs and took a shower, and then crashed on my bed.

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The next morning, I woke to my cell phone ringing. I heard "_Pick up the Pieces_" playing so I knew it was Tommy. I grabbed it and picked up.

"Hello?"

"Jude? Hey, it's Tommy. I need you to get down to the studio, ASAP. We need to record that new song of yours."

"OK." I said, and then I hung up. I got up and grabbed some clothes off the floor. Then went and took a shower.

20 minutes later, I was ready to go with my long sleeved black shirt, a band t-shirt, and my ripped faded jeans, I was ready to hit the road.

So I grabbed my car keys off the kitchen table, and opened the front door to see a familiar blue viper in the driveway…

End Chapter 1:

Hope you like it, and please review! It inspires me to write more…


	2. Quick Decisions

Still Just Way Too Much

Chapter 2: Quick Decisions

By: Can't Stand The Heat

"Why are you here?" I asked.

"Why, to take you to work of course."

"I'm a big girl, and I think I can take care of myself."

"I know that, it's just that… Please come with me. It'll make me feel better." I was confused, but I decided to go along with it.

"Ok, fine." I said, then jumped in the passenger seat, and slammed the door. I mentally laughed.

"Jude! What have I told you about slamming the door to my car?"

"That you are obsessed with an inanimate object that you love above everything." 'Not everything,' Tommy thought, as he thought of the girl, no, woman beside him, no girl, no woman, never mind…

"Hello? Earth to Tommy? We were planning on going to work in less than eternity right?"

"Oh, sorry." He said then began to drive away. While on the road to G-Major, Tommy said, "Jude, we have to talk." He focused his eyes on the road, and he had his steering wheel in a death grip.

"Yea, I know… Tommy I'm sorry. I should've listened to you, but I couldn't and I still can't. I'm sorry; it's all like a dream. But… I love you too. I'm just not ready to accept the fact that you love me." He pulled over to the side of the road, and stopped the car.

"Will this help?" He said then leaned over and grabbed my face and kissed me. He gently kissed me until I gasped as he bit my lower lip, and he pushed his tongue inside my mouth, that's when things began to get heated.

Then his hand tugged at the bottom of my shirt, and his other hand snaked up my shirt. He began to kiss my neck, and I stroked his hair. (A/N: Come on people what did you think I was going to write? Get your minds outta the gutter…) I pulled his head back up for another kiss, when 1 coherent thought went through my head. I stopped him.

"Tommy?" He looked up at me through half-open eyes, and they were glazed over with lust, and something else… His mouth was hanging open, and his face was a little flushed.

"Hm?"

"We can't do this."

"Why?" He went back to kissing my neck.

"Tommmmmmmy…" He stops. "Look we can't do this because I'm not ready yet. We can't. I need time to think about you, us, and my feelings. I just need time." He began to think after that. He pulled away from me, and started the car again.

It was silent the rest of the way. It gave me time to think, and Tommy to start to regret his actions. When we got to there, we both went directly to the studio. When we finished recording my new song, I went to get lunch down the street.

Tommy was in the studio with a guitar in his hands. He absent-mindedly began to strum a tune, and he sang what he was feeling.

_Girl can't you see,_

_That this is meant to be_

_It was always meant to be us,_

_For it was only you that I could trust…_

_Hold my hand,_

_Remember all the good times we had,_

_Hold my hand,_

_And remember how glad,_

_We were together,_

_Just hold my hand and remember,_

_Do you remember what hurt the most,_

_Before we were ever close to home,_

_Was remembering that I got so close,_

_But then I let you go,_

_You slipped through my fingers,_

_But that was so long ago,_

_Soooo long ago,_

_Will you please remember how glad you were?_

_When you held my hand…_

_Remember the rain,_

_Falling down from the sky,_

_Remember how calm we were,_

_When we were soaring high,_

_Please don't cry,_

_Remember how we passed it by,_

_When we soaring so high…_

_Hold my hand,_

_Remember all the good times we had,_

_Hold my hand,_

_And remember how glad,_

_We were together,_

_Just hold my hand and remember,_

_Do you remember what hurt the most,_

_Before we were ever close to home,_

_Was remembering that I got so close,_

_But I let you go,_

_You slipped through my fingers,_

_But that was so long ago,_

_Soooo long ago,_

_Will you please remember how glad…_

_You were when you held my hand…_

_Tonight's the night,_

_We'll find each other again,_

_We'll walk away and never look back…_

_Just don't let go of my hand…_

By the time he was done with his song, I had just walked through the door. I picked up a bag, and mouthed, "Lunch." He came in and grabbed a piece of paper, and wrote some words and notes on it.

"What did you do when I was gone?"

"Hm, what?"

"Never mind." He grabbed his food and sat down and stared straight ahead. I sat down and was thinking. I wasn't really hungry, so I was just thinking. Why does every time he smiles, why do I melt? Why does he have that kind of power over me? I picked up my guitar and strummed a tune. I sang some words, and eventually got this.

_You make me weak in the knees,_

_You opened my eyes and taught me to see,_

_Then you forgot about me,_

_And began this game of hide and seek._

_Stealing home,_

_Winning the game,_

_Alighting my heart,_

_With a burning flame,_

_With one more smile,_

_Or one more touch,_

_It's all still,_

_Just way too much,_

_Slow down,_

_Wait for me to catch up,_

_Mellow out,_

_Walk don't strut._

_Cuz I just got blown away,_

_Just the other day,_

_When you sped the other way,_

_Leaving me in your wake…_

_Stay back,_

_Keep me away from you,_

_You make me feel weak, _

_And that's the truth._

_Run like you always do,_

_In the other direction,_

_But excuse me,_

_This needs correction._

_Stealing home,_

_Winning the game,_

_Alighting my heart,_

_With a burning flame,_

_With one more smile,_

_Or one more touch,_

_It's all still,_

_Just way too much,_

_Slow down,_

_Wait for me to catch up,_

_Mellow out,_

_Walk don't strut._

_Cuz I just got blown away,_

_Just the other day,_

_When you sped the other way,_

_Leaving me in your wake…_

_Runnin, Runnin,_

_Like you always do,_

_Runnin, Runnin,_

_It's only you…_

_But now I'm the one that's runnin,_

_I need to get set free,_

_Cuz you freaked me out,_

_When you got down on one knee…_

_Stealing home,_

_Winning the game,_

_Alighting my heart,_

_With a burning flame,_

_With one more smile,_

_Or one more touch,_

_It's all still,_

_Just way too much,_

_Slow down,_

_Wait for me to catch up,_

_Mellow out,_

_Walk don't strut._

_Cuz I just got blown away,_

_Just the other day,_

_When you sped the other way,_

_Leaving me in your wake…_

_Runnin away,_

_Stop this game,_

_It's getting to hot,_

_And I can't stand the flame._

_I'm burning away,_

_I can't stand the heat,_

_So get off your knee,_

_And on your feet. _

Tommy had looked up when I said one knee, but it rhymed. I got out and walked to "The Alley." I stood there for what seemed the longest time. When I heard the door open, and out walked…

Him. He had followed me out here.

"Why?" Was all he said for about 5 minutes. Why what? "Jude… Who or what, inspired you to write that song?"

"I dunno…" I said, he turned on me.

"Jude, I need to know!" He looked frantic.

"Why?" Well, there's that question again.

"Because."

"Because why?"

"Because if that song was inspired by me then I know you love me." Wow. Shocker, that was unexpected. "Who?" I didn't want to answer, I wasn't ready to answer, but I did.

"You." I whispered, and at first I didn't think he had heard me, but then he spun towards me, and kissed me. I was too shocked at first to do anything, but then I melted. I couldn't help it. Things had been tense between us, but for this second, they melted away. Then he pulled away, and rested his forehead against mine.

"Jude… I love you." He said, and then he grabbed my hand, flashed me a grin, and dragged me towards his car. He opened the door and jumped in, and so did I.

"Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise." Was all he said, and then took off driving. I went to turn on music, when his hand stopped me.

"Jude, what is the first rule to my car?"

"Never touch anything in/out of your car. The music will be chosen by the driver, which is always you." Then I laughed. I stopped eventually.

When we got to the place we were going, it was a small blue cottage. It was pretty cool.

"Whoa, where are we?"

"This is my home."

"Snazzy." He grinned at me, and then dragged me to the door. He opened the door and pushed me inside. When he got the door closed, he pinned me against it, and he kissed me. I melted, and kissed him back. I moaned when he bit lightly on my lower lip. I felt him pull away, and I opened my eyes. He was pacing now.

"What's wrong Tommy?"

"Jude, you're 16!"

I rolled my eyes. "Tommy you can't keep going back to that. One day, I won't be 16, what's your excuse going to be then?"

"I'm your producer."

"So? We'll be careful."

"We could both lose our jobs. It is a great risk to both of our work."

"I'm willing to take the risk."

"Jude, I can't" I saw red.

"You know what Quincy, you're a coward. You run away from your feelings, and you lie to yourself and to the people who love you. You should be ashamed, you coward."

I was so angry, that I didn't mean half of the words I had just said. Then I saw him stalk towards me with an intense anger in his eyes. My anger turned to fear, and I backed away, but my back hit a wall. I gulped. He grabbed my shoulders and bellowed, "I AM NOT A COWARD!" And then he kissed me, hard. After that he proceeded to make love to me, brutally. It was my first time, and it hurt like hell, but I'd always remember it. I fell asleep next to the man I loved. It was a good sleep, and I could sleep forever. But unfortunately there is a world out there, but I didn't want to be there the next morning.

Too late…

End Chapter 2


	3. Crash And Burn

**A/N: Ummmm… To tell you the truth I have no idea where to go with this story after this chapter… Any ideas? Just review 'em, and I'll try to get them to work. Sorry, I've been working on a couple other fanfics too, so I'll start this one up again.**

**Begin Chapter 3**

I woke up the next morning and felt something beneath me. I opened my eyes to see that this wasn't my room. Oh shit… I looked under me, to see him. Real deep shit now… I yawned and went to get up, but his arms subconsciously wrapped around me tighter. Damn, this is getting complicated and so early in the morning too… I struggled but eventually swapped my place for a pillow. It worked a bit, but the pillow almost broke by how hard he was squeezing it. Then, the night before flashed before my eyes. I remembered everything. I gasped, and he woke up. He flashed me a grin, and then he realized the night before too. I couldn't tell if he fainted or was just laying there. But he fell back asleep, and I got all my stuff together. I got dressed quickly, scribbled a note for him, and drove to my house. I packed my bag, and grabbed my guitar. I then called the airport, and reserved a ticket for the next flight to New York, New York. I was planning on hanging out there, and things would cool down.

I was on the plane, and I was worried, but I wasn't about to back out now. Nope, I was off to go see Kat, and that was my excuse.

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I woke up, and Jude was sitting in the corner, and was staring at me. She was looking at me weirdly, so I flashed her a grin. Then I realized what had happened the night before, and I fainted.

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To say Kat was surprised that I had come from Canada to New York, without telling her, was an understatement. And I needed air when I was done. I walked a little ways away, and found a park. I grabbed my guitar, and went to play there. I had written a new song at Tommy's place before he had woken up.

_Crash and Burn_

_Shock me,_

_Mock me,_

_Make me,_

_Break me,_

_Driving me up a wall,_

_Then sitting back and watch me fall,_

_Leave it to me to tell this is wrong,_

_For this isn't where you belong…_

_People say,_

_Hate's a strong word,_

_But yet they use it everyday,_

_Crash and burn…_

_The flames incinerate everything,_

_And no one's left,_

_I said I hated you,_

_So you died with the rest,_

_At every wrong turn,_

_We crash and burn…_

_Driving me under,_

_Mocking and hating,_

_Leaving me out there,_

_Making and breaking,_

_Can't you just act mature,_

_For once in your life,_

_You taught me to see,_

_Then left me blind…_

_People say,_

_Hate's a strong word,_

_But yet they use it everyday,_

_Crash and burn…_

_The flames incinerate everything,_

_And no one's left,_

_I said I hated you,_

_So you died with the rest,_

_At every wrong turn,_

_We crash and burn…_

_You always denied it,_

_And I got blamed,_

_You set me up,_

_I was framed,_

_I left to get away,_

_But you follow me like a bad dream,_

_Stop this now,_

_Or I'll scream…_

_People say,_

_Hate's a strong word,_

_But yet they use it everyday,_

_Crash and burn…_

_The flames incinerate everything,_

_And no one's left,_

_I said I hated you,_

_So you died with the rest,_

_At every wrong turn,_

_We crash and burn…_

_Crash and burn…_

**End Chapter 3**

**A/N: Sorry for the short chapter, but read the Author's Note above for reasons why… Please help me with any ideas, Tommy could be eating ice cream with a penguin for all I care… That could work somewhere… Hmmm? Well, please help me… I'm pathetic! REVIEW!**


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